Crucial Takeaways #3 - Shanghai Major European RMRs A & B

Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed in this blog are purely personal and should not be considered as professional advice, some may contain satire or humor. Please interpret all content with this in mind and enjoy the read.

European RMRs: Where Legends Rise... and Fall Spectacularly

Welcome back to CS2 Insider! It’s me, Nestum, your loyal overthinker of all things Counter-Strike, here to take you on yet another journey of questionable analysis and borderline hot takes. This time, we’re diving into the European RMRs—a bloodbath of top-tier talent, legendary names, and, of course, a few clowns who showed up for the memes.  

From the titans of the scene to the teams who somehow slipped through the cracks, these RMRs had it all: heartbreak, redemption arcs, and more Ancient than any of us asked for. Whether you’re here to learn something or just to laugh at Tier 1 meltdowns, strap in—this one’s going to be a ride.  

Let’s jump into Crucial Takeaways #3 and see which European teams are heading to Shanghai, which dreams were crushed, and, of course, Astralis (xd). Starting with European RMR A.

Vitality and Mouz: Recipe for Boredom

Okay, I get it. The best teams are supposed to go 3-0—it’s the natural order of things. But come on, can we spice it up a little? Watching Vitality and MOUZ cruise to the Major undefeated is somehow more boring than watching a Dust2 AWP duel that lasts for two minutes and ends with both players missing. If it wasn’t them, it would’ve been NAVI and FaZe, which is somehow even duller. At least throw in a plot twist next time—maybe Astralis goes 3-0 just to make us question reality.  

Now, about Vitality and MOUZ: not much to critique here. Both are playing great Counter-Strike, cohesive as ever, and led by strong cores that know how to close games. Honestly, they’re so good I shouldn’t even have to give a crucial takeaway, but for the sake of my content agenda, I’ll say it: both teams are Major playoff-bound, and the absolute same goes for NAVI, not FaZe tho, they're not making it to the playoffs (im biased)

Cloud9: All My Agendas Are Falling Apart

Well, I can’t say I didn’t expect Cloud9 to make it through, but damn, they made it look way more convincing than I thought they would. HeavyGod—who, by the way, looks like he’s 30 but is somehow only 22—put on a hero mask and carried them with an absurd performance. I was honestly stunned. Losing to FaZe and still going 3-1 to qualify? That’s more than I could’ve ever imagined for this roster, which is a sad thing for me, who called them Tier 3 bots many times.

But let’s be real for a second. This is a freshly-formed core, and my Crucial Takeaway? They’re gonna crumble at the Major. No chance they make it far. They're like a building under construction—great potential, but you just know it’s going to collapse at some point. Just watch.

Fnatic: Frauds

Wow, guys, 3-2—are you proud of yourselves? Beating *three tier-5 bots* in Rebels, Dynamo Eclot, and BetBoom, while losing to the only decent teams you faced, NAVI and FaZe? Yeah, real championship material right there. Surely this team won’t crash out in the opening stage of the Major, right?  

Wrong. They suck, and I stand firmly by my beliefs. My Crucial Takeaway? No Legends Stage for you, fellas. Pack your bags early—Shanghai isn’t going to be a long trip.

BetBoom and GamerLegion: Absolute Cinema.

Oh boy, here we go. Buckle up, because this section is about to get a whole lot of bias. Yes, I’m a GamerLegion AND SAW fan—and I’m proud of it. Let’s not even pretend this isn’t the most biased section you’ll ever read on this blog, but honestly, I don’t give a single damn.

First off, BetBoom—what a joke. They eliminated MY BOYS. My Portuguese boys in SAW! Yeah, they deserved it, but who cares? Now let’s talk about the true hero: GamerLegion pulled a fucking Paris 2023 move, 0-2 down, they pulled themselves up to a glorious 3-2 and then, in the tiebreaker, knocked out BetBoom and snatched that Major qualification. What a comeback story! This is what we’re here for.

My crucial takeaway? Volt is the GOAT. The man is an absolute legend. If you’re not watching him play, you’re missing out. (The bias is crazy)

SAW: We Could Have Had It All

Man, as a Portuguese fan, this was tough to watch. We had the hopes, we had the dreams, but we also had the nightmares. Losing to SINNERS in Round 1? Absolutely gut-wrenching. But hey, we weren’t down for long—beating Unity and Falcons made us feel like we might pull it off. It looked like we had found our footing… until the NAVI match. Ouch. That loss took the wind right out of our sails. 

And then, the BetBoom match. It just felt like fate had already decided. Sure, it was a tough run with the roster changes and the coach swap, but the boys were SO CLOSE. They could taste it, but sometimes the CS gods aren’t on your side.

My Crucial Takeaway, no deep dives here because, well, they didn’t qualify. But SAW definitely deserved a mention. Keep your heads up, boys. Better luck next time (and maybe keep a closer eye on the coach).

Hall Of Shame: Didn't Earn a Detailed Mention

Well, here we are. The teams that didn’t qualify, and honestly, there’s a reason for it. "Unremarkable" is a nice way to describe their performances—because that’s what they were. These teams had their shot, and, well, they didn’t take it.

SINNERS – Always underwhelming. The only thing they’re good at is giving their fans just enough hope to crush it in the end.

Eclot – No surprise here. Mediocre at best, and when things get tough, they collapse faster than a house of cards in a wind tunnel.

Nemiga – Another team who just couldn’t get it done. No real standout moments, just vibes… and not the good ones.

Falcons – This team was literally a waste of money. Not even sure what they were thinking with that roster, but they definitely weren't thinking about winning. They suck.

Sangal – Who? Yeah, exactly. Moving on.

UNiTY – Same story. A little unity would have been nice. Too bad they didn’t have enough of that to make it through.

Rebels – The name says it all. Rebels against success, I guess. Just not enough firepower to even get a whiff of the Major. With that, we move to European RMR B!

BIG and 3DMAX: So Good They Made Valve Change The Rules

Now, this was a fun RMR. I mean, who doesn't love a good underdog story? Two teams going 3-0, against all odds, just proves that anything can happen when the big boys aren’t paying attention. Watching BIG and 3DMAX absolutely dominate was a sight to behold. However, I have to take a quick detour to talk about 3DMAX’s new logo... what a disgrace. Disrespecting the legacy of a team with such a rich history for the sake of woke nonsense? Absolutely tragic. Please, for the love of all things sacred, bring back the old logo.

But anyway, back to the action: These two teams were so good they practically forced Valve to rewrite the rules mid-tournament. Yep, you read that right—Valve changed their own rules just to make sure the smaller teams didn’t get their well-earned Legends stage invites. How? Why? Who knows, but honestly, it’s a terrible look. 3DMAX earned it, thanks to the mess that is Valve's ranking system. BIG? Despite going 3-0, they still have to play the opening stage, and that’s just plain dumb.

My Crucial Takeaway? I love what these teams did, but don’t expect them to make it to the playoffs. It would be fun, sure, but let’s be real—they’re probably not going far. Still, it was a hell of a show.

G2, HEROIC and Virtus Pro: The Usual Suspects

Well, well, well, who would’ve thought? Two of these three teams were supposed to go 3-0, but thanks to the ever-surprising RMR, they both ended up with 3-1 records. Wow, what a huge difference! It's not like they still qualified and somehow earned those dumb, undeserved Legends stage invites or anything... (eyeroll). 

Now, let’s talk about VP. We all know how I feel about these guys (spoiler alert: it’s not good). So my Crucial Takeaway for them is simple: No playoffs for you! I just don’t see them going far, and quite frankly, I wouldn’t mind seeing them choke in Shanghai. 

As for HEROIC, I just don’t think they have what it takes to make it through the Legends stage. They’ve got some solid players, but they lack that extra edge to make a deep run. Still, I’ll be surprised if they don’t put up a fight. But G2? They’re the real deal. They’ve got all the tools to go far, and I’ve got a feeling we’ll see them in the playoffs, no doubt.

PassionUA: I Love These Guys

PassionUA, man, they’ve got my heart. The way they went 2-0 and then qualified by beating one of my absolute favorite teams, Astralis, I couldn’t be happier for them. Their reactions? Priceless. Why on earth did one of the guys push his teammate's chair in and almost break the desk? I swear, these dudes are pure chaos, but it's the kind of chaos I love to see. It just shows how passionate they are about Counter-Strike, and honestly, I’m all for it.

Now, as much as I’m rooting for these guys, I’ve got to keep it real. I don’t see them making it out of the opening stage, not even close. It’s unfortunate, but that’s my Crucial Takeaway—they’ll put up a fight, but the dream run ends early.

Spirit and Eternal Fire: What Happened?

Well, these two teams have a lot in common, but also a lot of differences. First off, Spirit made it through by beating the almighty NIP (remember, this isn’t 2014 anymore) and Eternal Fire—who, by the way, were quarter-finalists in the last Major—couldn’t even qualify. And that, my friends, is absolutely mind-boggling.

Now, both teams showed signs of weakness, though Spirit's were a bit less glaring than Eternal Fire's. The Spirit we saw in Katowice earlier this year? Gone. They’re no longer the scary squad that you’d automatically chalk up as a loss. The edge just isn't there anymore, and facing them doesn’t send shivers down your spine the way it used to. As for Eternal Fire, I can’t even begin to explain what happened. Sure, they had some WTF performances in recent tournaments, but not qualifying for this one was an absolute shocker. I thought for sure they had this in the bag.

Hall Of Shame: You Already Know How It Works

Ninjas In Pyjamas – Never gonna get enough of mocking them, but honestly, respect. Making it to 3-2 and falling to Spirit on the tiebreaker was better than what I expected. Still, it’s a 0-3, lol.

Sashi – What can I say? The cow-logo team would look cool on a sticker, but they got no quality to back it up. Not much more to say here.

Astralis – Why do I even like this team anymore? Cadian AWP-IGLing was one of the worst sights of the whole year. Let's just move on before my heart breaks further.

9 Pandas – I don’t like this team. They’re always there but never quite make it. Didn’t make it last Major because of visa issues? Hilarious (your fault for being Russian). IDISBALANCE, though, cool nickname, I’ll give him that.

TSM – This isn’t 2015 anymore, guys. It’s just… no. Enough said.

Aurora – Having a Twitter admin who’s constantly bantering isn’t gonna bring results on the server. Hope you guys are aware of that. Focus on actual gameplay.

B8 – Honestly, can't understand what happened here. Since ESL Challenger Katowice, they’ve looked so weak. They were looking promising before, but now? It’s just the way CS goes. Shoutout to NPL, stuck there forever. XD

PARIVISION – Who even are they? Honestly, a 0-3 was expected. They didn’t really show up, so it’s understandable.

Last Thoughts Before The Smoke Clears

Well, my friends, that’s the breakdown of the RMRs that people actually care about and watch. Honestly, they were fun, but I’m hoping for an even more exciting Major. The real test is coming soon, and I’m ready for it.

Stay tuned for the first episode of "Unbiased Predictions", where we’ll dive into the Major and, hopefully, many more tournaments to come. You won’t want to miss it!

Thanks for reading and, as always, goodbye for now. See you next time—until then, don’t forget to drink water, guys.